Got scouted, then unscouted. Whatever. Doesn't matter much to me. Kinda makes you wonder why I got scouted in the first place, eh?
Why did I have to be creative today
It's a lot different than the stuff I usually do.
It's also less disturbing, even if my other things are only mildly so.
Check it out?:http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/absolutedeth/fluidity
That said non-depressing thing is doing better and better.
I feel so proud to have barely contributed to it.
Helped with beta testing and made the credits page for a friend's game.
Check it out: http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/658976
Stuff happened. Did a thing in response. Look at it. Or don't. Do what you will.
My digital vomit:http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/absolutedeth/mac-s-back
More of my bullshit, just what you needed.
No long news-thing today, I'm more tired than a marathon running sloth. With narcolepsy.
"This thing is fucked up. You're fucked up."
Oh, you again.
"Why is there two of them? What the fuck is wrong with you?"
This is explained in the post. I couldn't decide which to keep.
"Anger? What, did your mom take your iPhone, so you butchered cats?"
No. I had no reason to be angry, I just was. And enough of the cat-murdering business, I don't do that.
Love you too.
"Blablabla I'm shit":http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/absolutedeth/rage
Migraine forced my sleeping pills into a non-working state.
Love it when this shit happens.
SARCASM, YOU DICK.
Although, I do SOMETHING when I'm like this.
Speaking of which, I've got two new pieces.
One of them I had up a while ago, but the news system conveinently shit itself when I attempted to post about it.
Gorge thineself upon my inadequacy:
The last one looks more like an album cover than some dick tooling around with an art program.
Draw all questions about my current situation to a past piece I've done.
Pick one, I'm not your slave, most of them pertain to it.
I'd explain things if I wasn't so tired/hurting/pissed off.
Now go away.
Hello gentlemen, women, and degenerates.
Did I really neglect to post for so long?
I mean, it's not important to many other people, but I seriously meant to post on this thing.
I've fallen out of any sort of working schedule. Again. Not that it's important or anything, but it really makes me feel great when I set out to do something that I think's gonna be cool, and then fall directly on my face when it comes to accomplishing it.
But it's not my fault, my depression hasn't improved.
Maybe that IS my fault, though.
I should stop arguing with myself.
Okay, so my therapy stuff isn't helping much. The therapist asks me the same questions for an hour every visit, and usually cuts it off short anyway. Not getting any insight here. I understand the logic behind it, getting me to set an inquest into my thoughts by myself, but I've been with these fucking thoughts for a year and a half and I've gone down every path I can take with them. I should actually get to work on something, maybe kick my lazy ass into gear so I can prove that I'm not worthless.
Anyway, there's the mental status part of this post. (I've somehow gotten a format. Imagine that.)
"If you think I care, you are sadly mistaken."
If you don't care and took the time to read my post, you yourself are sad.
"It's good that you think of yourself as worthless, because you are."
Being worthless is in of itself a trait that has worth in today's world, it's just not something that I like.
"Oh, so you don't like yourself?"
That much has been made clear.
"You're a shitsquid."
And you're a dickchicken.
My sleeping pills aren't kicking in, but this is around that time. Before anyone asks, no one asks those questions to me, I'm just insanely critical of myself, and like to check my own logic at times. I'm thinking this is gonna be the closing thoughts segment from now on. Speaking of thoughts, these nights where the pills don't work leave me suprisingly lucid.
I should start working when I feel like this.
Actually that depends on where you are, so...
Fuck it, Good Aftermorndernooningnight.
I decided to make use of my several hours of inactivity throughout any given day and work on a project.
One that looks like this.
This is something I'll be doing to pass the time and hopefully recover some of my mental capacity.
This is not what I had LucidShadowDreamer make music for.
On a similar note to recovering mental capacity, I am currently being put through the induction process for a therapist, to (Again, hopefully,) make my depression and other problems go away. Dunno how long this is going to take, but they'll probably look at this project and say "That kid needs help."
"Why aren't you working on that project you bugged LSD to make music for that you were being an asshole about? By the way, fuck you."
Because I don't feel like it. It'll get done eventually.
"This looks like shit. It'll probably be shitty like all your other shit."
With all that shit coming out of your mouth, I'm assuming you need to wipe.
"You're going to see a therapist? You psycho motherfucker. What, do you murder cats?"
No. I have depression, and probably other things. Not the cat murdering kind.
"Liar. You're a psychopathic dickbag who needs to get removed from the face of the Earth."
Whatever lets you sleep at night.
"Fuck you, you smug bitch."
That's the sound of my parents going at it on the other side of a paper thin wall, so I should head to bed before I get an aneurysm from the thought.
Thank god I have music to listen to.